This lonely heart needs affection!

Having written about how a strong bond has developed with both my mother and my dog in a previous post on My Autistic Life, love is an emotion that is luckily felt in what can often be an extremely unsympathetic disability such as Asperger’s Syndrome but there are sadly more than one type of relationship and set of feelings.

Loving a family member or two is fine and with reciprocated thoughts, a sense of trust and happiness comes freely but while this brings a content feeling, other forms of affection and closeness are being missed out on.

Is it as apparent to yourselves as it is to me about what is being described here?

There is hope that this broken heart will mend.

There is thanks for having the opportunity to show empathy for those who are closest in everyday life but there is a gap that needs to be filled – something which can only be done by falling for a member of the opposite sex and therefore creating something which is far more romantic than anything else which can be achieved by spending time with family.

This may all sound a little ungrateful, for which an apology of enormous magnitude is offered to anybody who shows loving sentiment already as a mom, dog, auntie, uncle or indeed a friend, though its true and tends to feel stronger at sporadic times.

A little extreme to offer this sort of description maybe?

That’s what listening to a hefty dose of morose music and thinking negatively for a while can do to the mind!

Seriously though, a little romance really would be appreciated and yes, chances have come along in the past which have been ignored and while other attempts at finding love that masked these advances ultimately proved to be a bad distraction, stolen moments of tenderness have shown how a relationship could feel.

By sharing these kisses, hugs and holdings of hands, a lonely heart has found a home but when it comes to sustaining and building brief encounters into a requited union which could last for a longer period, nothing seems to last and blossom at all.

Whether this is down to personal fault or whether it is just the way that life is meant to be, meeting that ‘special lady’ would make a metaphorical space become filled and perhaps even cure this sense of longing which could bring on the label of a hopeless romantic.

Life isn’t a story where everything is perfect but personally, finding love and everything that comes with it would be.

As the title of John Gray’s guide on improving communication and health of a relationship by understanding a partner, originally published in 1992, would suggest, Men Are from Mars, Women are from Venus.

By saying that there is such a divide in understanding how two sexes think and also how differences and similarities may come across in how any task is done, gaining complete parity between two minds seems to be an impossibility but couples can and do stay together for many years.

About philevans
As a 26-year-old man that has lived with Asperger Syndrome since the age of nine, personal experiences throughout development can be found on My Autistic Life with the odd media review being thrown in for good measure.

2 Responses to This lonely heart needs affection!

  1. There is always hope for everything. Time heals all wounds, as they say. Everything happens at it own pace, in its own time. But I’m sure an intelligent guy like you already know all these cliches.

    • philevans says:

      Hey,

      Thank you for your comment and for offering those age-old pearls of wisdom.

      You’re right about time healing all wounds, if there are any that need to be truly healed and forgotten about, and about everything in life happening if and when it is meant to so its good to know that you feel the way you do on these issues.

      Phil Evans

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: